Friday, April 29, 2016

Mother's Day and Lilacs......


As I sit down to write my next blog, I am overwhelmed with ideas and emotions surrounding our upcoming Mother's Day.  When our mothers were with us, it seemed that they were eternal and would always be here.  As in all relationships, my Mom and I had some difficulties.  We were human and sometimes the dark side in both of us would take away from the beauty between a parent and child. My parents struggled through the Great Depression, WWII, Korea and the 60's.  I mention the 60's because I think our parents tried so very hard to make a life for their children that they never had....They both left home at tender ages of 15 and 16 to head north to make money in factories to send back home to their siblings and parents.  They never had a childhood, but worked so hard to insure we had one.  The 60's destroyed many families due to social changes and the Vietnam War.  Both divided families more than brought them together.  I'm not judging, but just stating that is what happened in our home at different times.  How very hard that must have been for my parents.....

My mother was so brave, and as I enter a new decade in my life and remember, I realize how brave she was.  Mary Louise, was a brilliant woman, beautiful, stay at home, balanced a check book down to the last penny, as there were never many pennies  left at the end of the month with one pay check and 3 children and  survived breast cancer and lung cancer. If born a couple of decades later, with more opportunities available to women, who knows what my mother could have accomplished. She could have become.a doctor, lawyer, teacher, pilot...who knows...but I do know the one thing my Mom was most proud of was being a Mom. Who could ask for more.

 My Pop worked hard to be certain my Mom could stay home.  I remember one time when my Pop  was working the night shift, my Mom  got a job as a waitress in an all night diner and made us kids promise not to tell Pop.  She knew we needed money and wanted to do what she could.  Well, one morning Pop came home early, 5:30 a.m. and Mom wasn't there.  We had to tell him.  Pop got tears in his eyes and left.  Within a half hour, he came in the door with Mom on his arm.. She was exhausted from working all night and Pop said he wouldn't have her doing that, so he began working double shifts to help bring in more money.  That is just the way their generation did things.  They knew how to survive and would take nothing from anyone.  I believe those qualities have  helped me through the most difficult times in my life...and I am eternally grateful to both of them.

I could write a book, but will keep this short, and ask you to take some time this Mother's Day to be with your Mom, or call her , if you are fortunate enough to still have her on earth.  If things aren't right between you, make it right...forgiveness is everything.  If your Mom has journeyed to the other side, take a few quiet moments and think of her...fond, happy memories....and know she will be sitting next to you enjoying  each moment with you....I'm convinced of that.....

Some memories of my mother:

1.Packing our lunches every morning with our initials on them...a bologna sandwich, chips, hostess cupcake and a nickel for milk.

2.Seeing her waiting on the sidewalk as I walked home from school...rain or shine...

3. Chocolate drop cookies...oatmeal with Hershey's chocolate.

4. Helping her hang clothes out on a warm Spring Day.

5. Holding my son while he slept.

6. Kissing a scrape on my knee to make it feel better.

7. The look of fear when I first got behind the wheel of a car.

8. Questioning my first boyfriend before we went to the movies.

9. Cooking pot roast, green beans and mashed potatoes for our weekly Sunday dinner.

10. Watching Perry Mason on our black and white TV.

and how she loved the smell of lilacs...........and so do I...............

"A tear falls from her eyes...
On her well-worn face...
She looks at me to see...
Her life in eternity...."  

 from "Through My Mother's Eyes"- Nancy Northrup

Thank you Mom for giving me life........